JackedGuy: Men's Dating, Fitness, and Self Improvement

JackedGuy: Men's Dating, Fitness, and Self Improvement

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JackedGuy: Men's Dating, Fitness, and Self Improvement
JackedGuy: Men's Dating, Fitness, and Self Improvement
How to Have Fun and Playful Conversations With Women: A Player's Guide

How to Have Fun and Playful Conversations With Women: A Player's Guide

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

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JackedGuy
Jan 27, 2024
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JackedGuy: Men's Dating, Fitness, and Self Improvement
JackedGuy: Men's Dating, Fitness, and Self Improvement
How to Have Fun and Playful Conversations With Women: A Player's Guide
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When men first embark on their journey of becoming good with women, they invariably confront two obstacles: conquering approach anxiety, and knowing what to say during conversations. The number of women that must be approached for this fear to vanquish is often dependent on the man’s characteristics and life experiences. I only had to cold approach approximately ten women for my nerves to mostly dissipate, and I primarily attribute this to optimizing my physique and looks in my early twenties, and more importantly, reframing how I tackled overcoming this fear, which is discussed in great detail here. 

Once approaching women is no longer an issue for men, they often don’t know what to talk about in order to build attraction, which leads to them engaging in boring and mundane conversation where emphasis is placed on the information that is exchanged. I credit this incompetence to men not developing the social skills or understanding of female nature in adolescence that many of their peers did (for more details, read this). Essentially, men are conversing with women they are romantically interested in like they would with their guy friends, yielding much rejection, flaking, and ghosting. 

It isn’t until much later, if ever, that men realize that a woman must be left with an emotional impact when hitting on her for her to want to date them. 

Status and Looks are a Crutch

Having boring and logical conversations with women doesn’t build attraction. 

With that being said, it is absolutely possible to cold approach a woman, leave no emotional impact (participate in boring and logical conversation) and still have her show up to the date. This usually happens when the man in question is the woman’s physical type (she thinks you are very attractive) or if he has high social status. Status is the most important attraction trigger for women, and it’s why millions of them would immediately and unquestionably agree to go out with guys like Drake, Michael B. Jordan, or Henry Cavill without requiring them to do any pre screening work beforehand that they would subject an average guy to. Luckily, you don’t have to be famous, have a blue checkmark on Instagram, or have a significant following on social media for a woman to deem you as high status. If it is evident that you are well respected by other men, possess a quality network, are desired by other women, and are competent in some domain (like being the strongest guy in the gym, or being the guy everyone seeks out for advice) that indicates status in a given area. Regardless, relying on your status and looks to date high quality women doesn’t make you any better at building attraction. If you work to enhance every aspect of your life, you will attract some women with minimal effort, and I don’t want you to think that that constitutes having good game. 

Maxim one: Stay on Topic

This guide will detail how to be playful and fun after your opening statements to a woman, as this is where most men struggle. For more detail on how to open, refer to this. Furthermore, in order to succeed at this, you must be a good listener, present in the conversation, and outwardly oriented. If you aren’t certain of your ability to do this, I highly recommend reading this guide before continuing. 

At some point in the conversation information will be given to you. This is important. If a girl gives you information about herself, that is an Indicator of Interest. Not necessarily a substantial or significant one, but nonetheless it demonstrates that she is willing to have a conversation with you (assuming her body language, facial cues, and non verbal gestures agree). Most guys fumble by taking this information in and immediately proceeding to ask another question that is often unrelated to the first, and women hate this. Asking unlinked, rapid fire questions makes them feel as though they are in a job  interview, and it’s what every guy with no game does. 

So, in order to build attraction, you must take what she says, and ask a related question about what was said that is not boring or predictable. This requires boldness – you can not care about the outcome of the interaction so much that you fear what you say might cause her to not like you (there are exceptions to this that will be discussed shortly). 

If a woman tells you she has ten siblings, there’s plenty of follow up questions you can ask in a way that is playful and fun:

  • Do you think parents have favorites?

  • Isn't it interesting how parents say they don’t have favorites but they clearly do?

  • Which sibling is your favorite? (ask why after she answers).

  • Did some of y'all ever get together and gossip about the others when they weren’t around?

  • Did all of you get along?

  • Do you have any  privacy growing up? 

  • If you had no privacy how did you…. y’know..? 

These are questions I generated in my head instantaneously without thought.

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